Nowhere Man

We are now in a state of total confusion concerning Paul's surgery and the resulting complications. When we took Paul to the ER to try to figure out what to do about the fever, they also took a CT scan to make sure the shunt had not over drained the ventricles. One good thing is that the fever finally broke and Paul is at least sleeping a little better. The CT scan showed that the ventricles are a bit larger than when he had the shunt replaced and we were referred back to the neurosurgeon who did the surgery. Hydrocephalus is still our main problem according to the ER doctor. We called the neurosurgeon yesterday morning and asked that we be able to speak to him as soon as possible. He called yesterday afternoon and told us that he has no idea why Paul has such severe headaches, or the issue of incontinence and the inability to swallow liquids very easily. He referred us to the neurologist who first recommended us to this neurosurgeon. We had talked previously to the neurologist and he said he is not a surgeon and does not deal at all with the use or problems of hydrocephalus and shunts. The ER physician told us to make sure to get our neurosurgeon involved because there was a problem with the shunt and the complications needed to be addressed. But he can't help us and the very first neurosurgeon won't help us because he didn't put in the new shunt. (That is very understandable.)

My sister in law, Kelly, is coming in to town today to help James take care of Paul, since he requires more care than prior to the surgery. She will also help me do some phone calling to see if we can find someone to help us with this vicious cycle we have going.

I sat up last night at 3 AM, on the side of Paul's bed and found peace in just having a real one on one with God. I experienced moments of sheer panic and frustration yesterday, along with saddness as I looked at Paul laying so helplessly, as he waits for us to help him. The long roller coaster ride yesterday left me drained. Prayer is what sustains me throughout. I can't help but keep repeating the name of Jesus. I smiled as I pictured a saint in heaven answering the 'red phone' and then saying to Jesus, "Fidero's on line one again." Jesus responds by sending people to my aid. My sister and brother in law came last night and we sat on the front porch and I was able to laugh a lot. It felt so good. Sitting in the rocking chairs had a very soothing effect. For those of you who know me, yes, I was rocking at a faster rate than the others.......smile. Great tension reliever, those rockers. My brother called and said he was sending Kelly on the next available flight to come help us also. The people at work were so supportive yesterday while I was at work, coming over to make sure I was okay. They knew what was going on with us and wanted to let me know they were praying.

I had to leave the office so that I could go to the 2 different hospitals to get all the medical records so that we can possibly find someone who can at least assess what is going on and guide us. We need a medical professional to answer our questions since this is...............well, brain surgery! I have done some research on this problem and know a little bit, but not enough to ask the right questions. We are just trying to get an understanding of why no one seems to want to help us. It is beyond my comprehension that this scenario could actually exist. Today we are looking for people who can help us find solutions. Please pray for our guidance. Pray for Paul to be relieved of his pain according to God's will.

In an effort to keep Paul from losing too much physically, we were able to get him to take 4 walks yesterday. They were short walks down the street and on one of them, our dog Abby was running down the street with James. She seemed so happy to be out and running with all of us in tow and Paul actually commented on how awesome his dog was and he smiled. He didn't really say anything else. He only speaks when he prays or when he talks about his dog.

Let's hope and pray for a day really soon that we can share some really positive news with you. Thank you for staying with us on this long haul. You don't know how often I draw strength from all your prayers and comments. You have shown yourselves to be 'faithful servants of God' in your loving, prayerful support. May God bless you with great graces.

Peace to all of you in Jesus Christ,
Jon and Rebecca