Times They Are a Changing

Working on gaining better balance.









He ain't heavy, he's my brother










Mike and Paul getting the mail.











This morning at Mass I had to smile as I realized how incredible God's timing is. In Atlanta, Spring is bursting forth and I really noticed it yesterday as I was outside waiting for the physical therapist to finish with Paul. Under the dead winter leaves are the new sprouts of Iris, Hosta, day lillies, and the Forsythia bushes are in full bloom. The Bradford Pear trees are white as snow with blooms and the Dogwoods are full of buds. All this new life around us reminded me of Paul's recovery. Some things are in full bloom, while other areas are just poking their heads out. As you know by now, I am a visual person and God has been so loving in allowing me to have all this natural beauty give me the visual aid needed in keeping my hope and joy alive in my heart. Yesterday I was astounded not only by the beauty of Spring, but by the accomplishments of Paul and it seems both are right on course.

He had all 3 therapists come yesterday and they helped Paul accomplish a lot. The occupational therapist gave us a number of strengthening excercises to do with a large theraband to help Paul regain his upper body strength and to gain better balance. We are to do them 2 times a day. I have asked Mike to do the afternoon set with Paul and he worked with him yesterday and got full cooperation from Paul. The physical therapist had Paul unload the silverware and load the dirty silverware from the sink. She then had him fold 2 loads of laundry. She told me afterward that she didn't think the folding job was done very well. I looked and laughed because it is exactly how he used to fold his clothes when they weren't stuffed in the back of closets. She said that he recognized when any piece of clothing was inside out and he turned them right side out. She was impressed with that. She said that he mentally thinks he has to depend on someone holding his arm or hand to get around and that we need to help him realize he can do it alone. In the middle of her therapy he excused himself and went upstairs to use the restroom. He went up and down by himself, which shows he is ready to be independent of our support, except to stand by to keep him from falling. The speech therapist wanted to know why he still had a feeding tube and I explained the issues with swallowing. She had him try a couple of things and she said his muscles are fine, but they need to be retrained to remember to swallow. So she came up with the plan to have him excercise these muscles by having him swallow things every 30 minutes. We are to start with a piece of food, followed by a small sip of drink and alternate for 4 times. We will work on consistency before we work on quantity. We tried it while she was here and he was able to do five swallows of food and drink. I have started a graph to show what he was able to do each half hour. We started again this morning and he can consistently swallow 4 sets (food then drink). Our goal is to have him swallowing enough liquids each day so that the tube can come out. It will be one less thing we have to concern ourselves with and will help Paul gain the independence he needs in order to recover more fully.

I was so excited watching him go through all his excercises, showing good balance and strength. I felt like we were finally making some progress and I have something concrete to work on with him. I really enjoyed the idea of his helping with chores around the house. Hopefully he won't remember how much he tried to avoid them in the past. He is to do some every day. It will pull him back into the real world more quickly. Not that his real world included chores...........big, big smile.

Yesterday, after he was done with his excercises with Mike, he still had the yard stick in his hand. I asked him what it was. He looked at it and said, "a meter stick." I asked him to turn it over, thinking that one side was inches and the other side was centimeters. I asked him again what it was. He said "the other side of a meter stick." Mike and I burst out laughing and I asked him what was the measurement on the stick. He looked and said, "a 3 footer." I asked what that would equal and he said, "a yard." I asked him what that stick might actually be called and he said a yard stick. A 'long' effort for one word, but it was enjoyable getting him to remember it.

I had heard that damage to the left side of the brain may result in a person being more sad and mournful, since those emotions are very predominant on the right side. I asked Paul if he felt sad or if he felt happy. I asked if he knew the difference. He said he did. I asked if he felt more happy or more sad in that moment. He said happy. On a scale of 1 - 10, he said he was a 9. He doesn't smile alot, so I was wondering if he feels mostly sadness inside. Last night, he laughed when his dad said something, and that made it the 2nd time we had seen him actually laugh. Then today, he laughed again. He doesn't laugh when most people might, he does it when it is least expected. It is very much in keeping with his very dry sense of humor though. What he has laughed at is funny, but not in a usual way. I think I mentioned this before that he didn't really smile or laugh much as a baby and the one time I remember him really laughing hard was due to a fairly insignificant occurence. I threw a ball up into the air, clapped my hands 2 times, then caught the ball as it came down. He started to laugh really hard and laughed the next 3 times I did it. Even Jonny came over and said "He laughed!!" like it was a big event. That has remained a very memorable event in my mind. His laughing 2 times in the past 2 days is another memorable event!

God is a personal God and treats each of our souls differently. We need to be patient with His way and timing. The Blessed Mother's strength of faith gave her the fortitude to accomplish her part her in God's plan for salvation. I pray that I can model myself after her example and that she will take my mission into her care to protect it. Each of us has our own personal mission and May God our Father give us the grace of a strong faith so that we can accomplish what He has reserved for each of us to carry out His plan.

Love,
Jon and Rebecca