Top Hat

Paul is helping pack the lunches for the homeless people downtown








Helen, Paul, Jerry and Michael getting more of the food ready








Jerry, Jon (behind them) and Paul and his dog Abby





Fr. Peek, Jon, Paul, Rebecca and Michael











Thursday Sept 14
I am sorry about such a late posting again. I had one 75% completed and lost it when my computer shut down. This is the first chance I have had to get back to it. Yikes, what a busy week this has been!

On Sunday, we got a great surprise at Mass. Fr. Peek was at St. Stephen's to say Mass since Fr. Paddy was out of town. Fr. Peek was one of the wonderful priests who came to the hospital in those first few weeks that Paul was in intensive care and blessed him. In fact, he was there the night that we got the news that Paul had a blood clot in the main artery in his brain and there was a good chance he would not live. Fr. Peek admistered the sacrament of Annointing of the Sick to Paul. He met with everyone in the hospital chapel and lead everyone in saying the rosary. A week later, he came back and said Mass in Paul's room. He also brought the zuchetto worn by Pope John Paul II during a Mass celebrated on December 22, 1996. The custom is, if you bring a zuchetto that was made for the Pope, specifically from the Italian tailor shop that is authorized to do this, it will be exchanged with the one that the Pope is wearing at the time. Fr. Peek was at the Mass on that day, and he brought a zuchetto with him, handed it to the Swiss guard and this guard brought it to the Pope. Pope John Paul II took the one from his head and put on the one Fr. Peek brought. Fr. Peek then received the zuchetto (skull cap) that Pope John Paul had been wearing. Fr. Peek placed this very zuchetto on Paul's head, for him to wear while Mass was being celebrated in his hospital room. The nurse on duty also attended, along with the family and friends who were there that night. I will never ever forget that evening. The room was filled with such peace and so were we! So, it was just terrific to see Fr. Peek again. He was very glad to see Paul and to see him walking and able to attend Mass with his family. He told Paul to remember that it is easy to be a Christian on a sunny day, but that the most powerful prayer of Christ was on the cross. He encouraged Paul to stand firm in his faith as he worked toward his full recovery, and he blessed him. We got to visit for about 15 minutes more and learned that he had been in Rome again this past Summer and had actually been close enough to Pope Benedict XVI to hold up another zuchetto he had purchased at the Italian tailor shop and Pope Benedict himself exchanged the one he was wearing with the one Fr. Peek help up high for the Pope to see. He said it was just an awesome moment for him. We were thrilled for him!

Saturday afternoon we went to St. Stephen's to help pack lunches and put together hot meals that had been cooked for about 35 people who live under a bridge downtown. There is an outreach program that does this every Saturday afternoon and has been for about 8 years now. Jerry and Michael were going to be delivering the meals, so we decided to take Paul with us to help them get it all ready. When it was almost done and the other people were getting the food coolers into the van, Paul went into the church and prayed for about 15 minutes. Mass was going to start, so he came back to the cafeteria about the time we were ready to go. He is doing very well with getting around independently. He told us he was going to leave to go pray and then walked away without anyone's help. It is wonderful to see him making decisions about what he wants to do and then doing it. One step closer to being as independent as before!

On Monday, I got to go to an afternoon therapy class with him and I spoke to his speech therapist. She is the coordinator of all his therapies and she said he will be finished in 2 more weeks. I could see Paul STARING at her as she told us this. I knew how disappointed he was to hear it will go that much longer. He really doesn't like rehab. He told me later that he knows that it must be doing something for him and he trusts God is leading him along, but he sure wishes it would have ended by now. The only therapist he actually had a repore with, is now training a student and Paul doesn't have that same connection with her. He said he will try hard complain about rehab as much, since he knows we are only trying to help him get better. He still needs help with his short term memory and will for a long time. They are working on helping him learn to schedule his time by charting out the next day's schedule and following the list he makes. At the end of the day we are to get him to talk about his day to help him remember all that he did. That is his homework for this weekend. There are 4 different categories that he will need to pick 2 things from each and fit it into his daily routine, along with his daily grooming, eating and sleeping times. They are activities that will include his cognitive, physical and occupational skills. He will also be going to work 2 days a week until he is done with therapy, then he will go to work each day for 4 hours. He will be able to go to Mass 2 times a week on the days that Jerry is here to help him. This week, he went to work on Tuesday and stayed 3 1/2 hours. He hopefully will get another few hours in on Friday.

Paul went out to eat for lunch today with his rehab group. Not really a new experience for Paul. He loved going out to eat before the accident and he still loves it. Wednesday night, he asked what was for dinner and when I mentioned that I was going to use what had been left from the night before, he looked at Jerry and asked if he wanted to go get something to eat. Jon and I were very tired, so we stayed home and Jerry took Paul out. It was actually a wonderful break for us and we enjoyed a quiet meal. Mike was busy working on a project for school and had gone with some friends for a very late afternoon meal. It was so much like how it used to be. Paul out with friends, Mike doing his own thing and Jon and I enjoying the quiet. Then Thursday, I planned on going to my women't prayer group again after 7 months and that is always a night the guys go out to eat. Paul was again very glad it was a 'dinner out' night.

We have an appointment with the opthamologist on Monday and the ear doctor October 2nd. I am remaining hopeful that someone will be able to get some of the problems solved soon, concerning Paul's eye/orbital issues. After our appointment on Monday, I will know better when to schedule the appointment with the neurosurgeon we heard about who is in Charlotte, NC. We will continue our search for the doctor who can find the answers to Paul's hydrocephalus problems and the relief of his headaches.
Once rehab is done, we will be back to seeing all these different doctors and coordinating any possible surgeries. If possible, we would like to have it done by the holiday season. We can then set our sights on attaining the goal of getting Paul back into college for a class or 2 by the summer semester - wouldn't that be just terrific? A fine goal to be sure!

Today was the feast of the Exultation of the Cross. Another reminder about what Fr. Peek told Paul on Sunday. From the Magnificat daily prayers, it is explained "the event of the cross and Resurrection abides and draws everything toward life". We exalt Christ's cross whenever we freely take it up, filled with the certainty that the ultimate meaning and fulfillment which we crave in life comes to us through this unending event. St. Leo the Great says "the sign of the corss makes kings of all those reborn in Christ." As I read all this today, I thought about the beautiful example Paul has been to our family. He starts each day out with a prayer asking for God's help and strength. He keeps close to Jesus each day in prayerfulness, asking for help with relief from his pain, yet never displaying anger about the 'cross' he has right now. And he remains patient as he waits for God's will to be done. I find myself praying for that same strength that Paul displays. A few days ago, I was helping Michael find a baby picture of himself that he needed for his senior yearbook and we were having a great time remembering past events as we looked at the pictures. Then slowly, the sadness started to creep in as I came across one picture after another of Paul's beautiful smiling face and his interactions with his brothers. I wanted Paul to be that free spirited kid again - to have a 'full' life again. The next day, I was looking for the pictures to post on the blog and Paul was behind me. As I was scrolling through all the pictures we have online, I came across some of him from the summer before his accident. Again, that bright smile and face looking back at me. I started to cry and Paul put his hand on my shoulder and apologized for the pain he had cause me. I told him that I just wanted him to be free of pain and wanted him to have his sight and I felt so helpless. He hugged me and said "God knows what He is doing. He needs me to do this for a while longer." Paul makes a lot of jokes during the day and will have some cynical retorts about rehab and other things, but when he talks about God, he could not be more serious. He speaks with such a calming tone and I find myself filled with peace and faith that God really does know. I can't describe in words how awesome some of these moments with Paul can be - but he keeps leading us to greater acceptance and a desire to be more holy.

Jesus, we trust in you.
God bless,
Jon and Rebecca Fidero